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TALL PERSON DEVELOPS FEAR OF HIS OWN HEIGHT
Freshman Nat Walsh has realized he is now afraid of his own height. Standing at a towering 6’8″, the very prospect of getting up has...
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Citizen Changes Profile Picture, Feels Satisfied
Ellen Hunt, an upper-middle class suburban mother, became a hero after she changed her Facebook profile picture to include a French flag...
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Law Library Successfully Converted Into Former Law Library Museum
Quinnipiac University has finished renovations on the Law Library and will soon be opening the Former Law Library Museum, in the exact...
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BATTLE OF THE BANDS ENDS WITH HUNDREDS DEAD
With killer guitar riffs, deadly beats, and manslaughter lyrics, WQAQ’s annual Battle of the Bands ended in tragedy, with hundreds of...
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ROOMMATE WON’T STOP TALKING ABOUT HOW THEY KNOW RAY ROMANO
Zack just won’t shut the fuck up about knowing Ray Romano. For about the thousandth time today he has gone out of his way to somehow...
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EVERYONE KNOWS YOU’RE GOING TO BREAK UP WITH YOUR HIGH SCHOOL GIRLFRIEND
Despite your repeated statements to the contrary, sources say that everyone knows you’re going to break up with your high school...
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PHILOSOPHY STUDENT PROVES HE DOESN’T EXIST
Last week, philosophy student Anthony Florence made a revelation that he does not, in fact, exist. After about seven hours of refuting...
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ZBT NERDS EXCITED TO BECOME MOST POPULAR FRAT AT QUINNIPIAC
Following the cease and desist ordered by Quinnipiac on the University’s chapter of Sigma Phi Epsilon, the nerds of Zeta Beta Tau...
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SigEp Releases Inspiring Video, Turns Out To Be Hazing
After accidentally uploading the raw footage from their recent inspirational video, it was revealed that SigEp forced their pledges to...
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OLD MAN ACCIDENTALLY WANDERS INTO WIGO PARTY
Over the weekend, an elderly man, confirmed to be John Lahey, was spotted at the WiGo-sponsored house party after wandering away from the...
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