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New Legislation Proposes to End Gun Violence With More Guns
After the recent spike in gun violence in America, US government officials were proud to announce that they’ve finally found a solution....


QU Hires New Old White Man to Solve Diversity Issue
In order to tackle the so-called “diversity issue” on campus, Quinnipiac has created an entire position dedicated to fixing the problem....


An Open Letter to the Fetus I Absorbed in the Womb
To the fetus I absorbed in the womb: wow, I’m sorry it took this long for me to write to you. I’ve been meaning to write this letter for...


Jeb Bush Starts New Anti-Bullying Campaign
Former presidential candidate Jeb Bush has refocused his time and energy on what he feels is a more important and rewarding path than the...


My Roommate is Dead to Me
My roommate has been absolutely intolerable the past few days! She hasn’t gotten out of bed in over 48 hours and when I try and talk to...


Hundreds of Freshman Burn to Death Standing on Commons Bridge
This past week, Quinnipiac’s sky was heavily tainted with the smoke-filled ashes of hundreds of burning freshman. Experts determined the...


Citizen Changes Profile Picture, Feels Satisfied
Ellen Hunt, an upper-middle class suburban mother, became a hero after she changed her Facebook profile picture to include a French flag...
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