Editor-in-Chief of Quad News, Max Baldwin, reportedly stunned his entire staff when he decided to take them on an impromptu team-building exercise to a kindergarten classroom, in order to finally learn how to draw a simple line.
“I’ve always wanted to learn how to do this,” arts and entertainment editor Taylor Popielarz told reporters at the scene, as he struggled to move his pen in a single direction for any length. “I’ve always felt that I should be the guy who decides where the line should be. Only me, though. I want to decide for everyone.”
The unplanned team-building exercise comes at the heels of the release of Quad News‘ second physical edition of the year. Some students, however, may or may not maybe disagree with the content that Quad News puts out. When asked about how the Quad News is perceived on campus, student Eric Holder told reporters, “I think Quad News is […] but it can also sometimes cherry pick the comments of a few people to fit a narrative.”
This opinion is likely echoed by all students on campus, including the staff themselves.
“It used to be that we would encourage any new and independent ideas, because we loved to push the boundaries and provide something the students weren’t getting before, that’s how we got started,” Senior Managing Editor Danielle Susi told reporters, as her hand curved slightly left on her paper until it made a full circle, “but then at some point, I just stopped caring.”
“This is a line, right?” she added.
“Usually we just stay within the lines as much as possible,” the visibly exasperated Max Baldwin told reporters as the collective frustration to draw a straight line in the room mounted, “that’s why our paper’s content is virtually indistinguishable from The Chronicle’s, despite us being an independent paper. We’re simply unaccustomed to drawing lines.”
“Or maybe we just forgot how,” he added, as he looked at the page of squiggles he managed to make. “But either way, I can’t wait until I finally learn, because I feel that as head of an independent newspaper, maybe I should know how to make a line.”
“And once I do that, maybe I can dare to cross it.”