Exit Poll Results have come in and showed Trump has polled statistically high among masochistic women.
Masochistic women are those who receive a sexual gratification from pain and being degraded, a group that has a clear array of reasons for supporting the Republican Candidate.
Local woman,Suzie Cranston, identifies as one of these masochistic Trump supporters.
“When he says that he can do anything to women because of his celebrity status – man I make vanilla pudding in my panties,” Cranston said, in a voice a tad more breathy than necessary.
Cranston is not alone in her political views. Jackie Burns, a freshman at Quinnipiac university, reflected upon her first voting experience. “Voting was such an exhausting process, so I gave my support to a candidate who’s most likely to take that right, and my stress, away!”
“He’s called us pigs, slobs, and dogs: comparisons that all little girls dream of hearing from their President,” Cranston claimed while pressing her thighs tightly together. “I need a leader that’s not afraid to boast of his sexual assaults. I’m eager to see who else he will grab right by the pussy, maybe even me.”
It was found among exit polling questions that most masochistic women were nervous they wouldn’t be able to get to the booth in time due to the fact that their hands were literally tied.