Move over Joseph R. Biden, a new player from Pennsylvania is stepping onto the debate stage, and he wants to be YOUR next Commander in Chief.
Just weeks after being crowned the newest president of Q30 Television, Connor Coar felt there was moar in stoar, and is tossing his hat in the ring for the 2024 American presidential election, revealing his campaign slogan: COAR FOR 2024.
“Since the dawn of our nation’s history, people have loved an underdog story, and I’ve got that dog in me,” swore Coar, mid-salute to an American flag he hung in the media suite yesterday. “If I can prove I have what it takes to run the biggest Quinnipiac student-run television station in the whole university, why can’t I become the leader of the free world?”
Coar announced his bid for president during a recent Discord voice chat speech. Addressing the entire server for Q30’s ‘Quinnipiac Tonight’ show, he promised that he would increase parking spaces in North Lot by 200% within his first 100 days in office. This idea was met with rousing support from his dozen or so listeners.
“I’m all for Connor becoming president of America bro,” said Jonathan First-year, a senior agricultural plumbing major. “This is good news for all voters in the sports, entertainment and news departments across our nation. Who cares about the economy, international diplomacy, or the climate? We need someone who knows how to make good content, and Connor is the man for the job!”
There's no word yet on a potential running mate for the campaign, but sources say Coar may reveal his pick for Vice President on an episode of The Barncast next semester.
Comments